Summer Lovin’ Had me a Blast

As I was doing casual laps in a circle around the pool tonight prior to going to ballet class it occurred to me that maybe part of my issues with the seasons that aren't Summer (in addition to not wanting to be cold) are that the other seasons all come with OBLIGATIONS. I HATE obligations. As soon as Summer ends things get all crazy with shit. HalloweenThanksgivingChristmasNewYear'sValentine'sDay…everything just HAPPENS and suddenly you're arguing about where to spend C'mas or how to have a vegan T'giving to appease some distant relative's significant other.

Summer? No Summer doesn't do that. Summer comes free of obligations. The only "holidays" are MemDay, July 4^th and Labor Day and their distinction is that there are no obligations. Yup, it's true. You can get invited to 14 bbq's and 4 pool parties and not go to any of them or go to all of them and no one cares.

It's carefree and rather childish, or actually rather teenager-ish to enjoy the lack of obligations so much but I think that's a big part of it (other than the sultry warm weather and dripping humidity which come with their own dose of teenage angst and oversexed hormones).

Summer has iconic Summer songs associated with it. Everyone has a few Summer songs that immediately conjure up specific memories, even specific smells that make a person feel young again, invincible, HOPEFUL. No other season has that, sure, C'mas has its own music but it just isn't the same, it's something that everyone shares, to the point of irritation we all share too many C'mas songs in stores, in advertising…EVERYWHERE but Summer songs? Those dig deep, they speak to someone's individual heart and soul, they get personal.

So those were my reflections from the pool today. Summer is more than just heat and humidity, it's my favorite years, it's being a girl in my Summer clothes, it's flirting with boys on the boardwalk until the sun comes up, it's walking out of a sweaty club and seeing the sun rising over the beach, wash, rinse, repeat.

It's Italian ice for breakfast and a long nap on the beach. It's a bike ride at dawn and another one at dusk. It's short nights and long, long, sultry days.

It's not wondering where to eat C'mas dinner or what to buy Aunt Martha this year. I admit that I can wax romantic over C'mas songs and can kill a December afternoon staring at Hallmark holiday flicks but one needs to pass the cooler months SOMEHOW.

It's going to all 14 BBQ's AND those 4 pool parties in one day then watching the fireworks burst over the beach.

Summer = Heaven

Stick Figures

Back in those days of big hair and parachute pants known as the 1980s there was another annoying fad known as "Baby on Board". Yup, those little yellow plastic diamonds suction-cupped into the back window of the family mini-van. They were annoying and got no less annoying (though slightly more humorous) as their parody signs started spouting up all over the place.

I rarely see any of those anymore, for that I'm grateful.

Their replacement is even more offensive and annoying though. Stick figure families. Have ya seen 'em, they're like Colorforms for your rear window (I know, I'm old you probably don't even know what a Colorform is, look it up, you're on the internet)? The back window of the family Prius now sports a stick figure depiction of the family that drives around in said Prius. I have never actually seen these stick figure thingys for sale anywhere which makes me think that they are only available in stores that cater to the cult of family which I don't frequent.

Since I don't know where or how one acquires these little gems I can only entertain that in my incredibly boring fantasy world. Does one go eagerly into the "Stick Figure Store" and peruse the wide selection of stick figures? I've noticed that you never see a stick figure family of fattys, do they not exist or do you just choose to fictionalize yourself as a thin, hip family or do only thin, attractive, hip families buy these? (As usual, SO MANY QUESTIONS.)

These adorable little stick figures families often depict a pony-tailed mom, a sporty dad and any variety and combo of little kids. A young boy with a hockey stick, a young girl in a ballet tutu, perhaps two little diapered babies and let's not leave out the family pets, a dog and two cats.

What does it all mean? Do I care that you are allegedly the proud bearer of the "perfect American family?" Do you care that this is your legacy depicted on the window of your car like some ancient cave painting?

Of course I have seen the occasional single mom depiction which makes me want to approach the woman and point out that she's driving an advertisement for sexual predators. "Looky me, I drive a Mercedes SUV, I have no spouse and two teen-age daughters, please follow me home to my darkened McMansion". Does this stuff only occur to me? Granted I have a long commute which affords me far too much time for my mind to wander down these unlit parking lots of thought but still…

I have a fantasy of finally seeing one that depicts sad reality. A single woman and then along the entire remainder of available window space 30 or 40 stick figure cats. That one'll be sure to keep people a safe distance away. "Hey, look at me; I'm that cat lady your friends all warned you about!" I haven't seen it yet but I know she's out there and will one day proudly display her true self.