Why we stay

A widely circulated Gallup poll shows that people leave their jobs because of bad bosses. Bad bosses seem to be bad for business, well if you want to keep your employees and not deal with turnover and all that goes with it.

But why do people STAY at a job? I just left a company I was at for TEN YEARS. Yes, TEN YEARS. Why did I leave? Yuppers, I’m not all that original, I left because of a bad boss (or two).

I knew that I was interviewing for jobs because I had to get away from a management situation I felt was toxic to me. But there was hesitation on my part. I would get called about a job but hesitate to interview and I decided to examine why I did that.

I figured out that the main reason I was sticking around that joint was for a bunch of perks completely unrelated to the actual job. I was getting zero job satisfaction, coupled with a boss that I couldn’t stand but I was sticking around for reasons that didn’t relate to the job or my boss at all.

I was even sticking around for things I didn’t use, I just liked knowing they were THERE.

What did we get? Oh we’ve gotten things like George Forman Grills (my husband called that “small appliance Wednesday”), more fleece jackets (of increasingly fabulous quality) than I’ll ever wear, from October through the end of last year they had special events every Friday including free lunch and snacks every single Friday, stuff like designer cupcakes and three different types of brownies, chair massages and a free gift wrapping service. We were awarded points like S&H green stamps that we could use to “buy” things like jewelry and Coach bags.

The list goes on and on…

Of those things I can say that we do use the grill, I wear the fleeces, but those Friday things? Nah. I’m always watching my weight so those Friday indulgences were more of an annoyance to me, who the hell wants to wander through the pantry area and see box after box of assorted designer cupcakes? Yes, I admit I did get one of those chair massages on a Friday afternoon…but it was kinda weird to be getting a massage at 3 in the afternoon at work, I get regular massages on my own and I think I’ll keep it that way.

The reason I was staying was for silly little things, little bribes the company put out there for just that reason, to get people to stay. When I thought about it I felt sad because it hinted that maybe, just maybe they actually know that there are serious management issues and instead of fixing those it’s easier to toss another shiny gift on the heap. I felt like a little kid that was easily duped into eating their veggies in exchange for a useless plastic toy. I didn’t need another fleece jacket or even a Forman Grill. I can buy those things but my inherent human greed kept me hanging on for the next little trinket. Ooooh, shiny things…I want them.

Even as I was closing in on a real job offer, something that sounded good, a good fit for me, a step up the food chain, a challenge and all that other happy horseshit, I was still hesitating. I had to make it through the holidays, I had to see what our holiday gift would be…it’s always something fab like an iPod or iTouch so I couldn’t miss out on that could I? I strung along my new job so I could milk every last shiny treat out of them before the end of 2010. Just so ya know, the gift wasn’t even worth it in the end.

And the time off…oh the time off, I think when all was said and done I came in at nearly 8 weeks off a year and no, I’m NOT a school teacher. It was hard to cut that back to just 6 weeks or thereabouts…but maybe if I don’t hate the job as much it won’t be as painful to be there…had I even considered that? Probably not and why not? Most likely because after ten years of mostly dreading going to work it’s hard to imagine that maybe, just maybe I won’t dread the next job quite as much which will certainly make it a bit easier to NOT have to pray for the next time I can take a day or ten off.

Now that it’s over, now that I’ll be starting a new job in a few short days, I realize how stupid I’ve been. I’ve been struggling against management decisions that I’ve questioned for quite some time but like a small child I was far too enamored by the dangling treat than by the rational knowledge that I needed to get the fuck out of there.

Will my new job be perfect? Who knows? I’m sure I’ll find stuff there that I don’t’ like, I hope that doesn’t happen for a few years at the very least but whenever it happens, if its stuff that I just can’t live with, well, I hope that I don’t linger past my time just because of some fancy shiny objects dangling in my face.

Those of you in jobs you hate, suffering with a boss that is mean, stupid, unbearable or any combination of those things, ask yourselves why the hell you’re staying. If you’re there because you really can’t find something else, I’m genuinely sorry for you, I really am and I know this economy sucks but if you started to sound like me and said you were there because you got a lot of vacation time you’d accrued and you couldn’t walk away from it or you got all kinds of fancy treats then it’s time to reconsider.