The SATs of Shopping

Christmas shopping is like taking the SATs (those are the Scholastic Aptitude Tests, you knew that, right?). You shop and you shop and you shop right up until the end. It's like when the teacher tells you that you have to shut your test booklet and put your pencil down. That's it, suddenly it's Christmas Eve and you are DONE shopping, whatever you didn't get you are NOT gettin'.

I thought that I was down to just buying some scratch off lottery tix tomorrow and I was DONE. DONE. I could finish before the time was up and I had to close my wallet and put down the stylus used to sign the credit card receipts. I thought I was there…then I remembered that essay question I skipped back on page three.

FUCK!

I bought hubby some small and rather benign gifts. We've been together quite a while and with no kids to buy for we just kinda buy ourselves whatever we want…within reason…when we want it. Awesome, right? Yes but it really would be nice to surprise him (or me) with something…well, UNEXPECTED (like the year hubby got me a commissioned portrait of our dogs at the time, we've since added one to the pack).

And when did that opportunity for me to do that for him rear its ugly head? Ooooo, at about 8:30 on the eve of Christmas eve. Yeah, swell.

And is it something easy? No, because easy would not fall into that category of the "ah-ha" moment on C'mas morning.

So what is this rare and precious item?

An iron doorstop in the shape of a dog that is somewhere at a local antique center that may or may not be open for some random and unpredictable hours tomorrow…and I don't know what booth the damn thing is even in.

So here I am realizing at the last minute that I forgot that essay question back on page 3 of the test booklet.

We have Christmas Eve plans starting at 3PM tomorrow including a 7 fishes dinner with a newly engaged couple and yet I'll be up early banging on the doors of the antique center two towns away and willing to pay any price for the damn thing.

And pencils down students.